


Disaster Chat

by HailingTorrent



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, F/M, Gen, Group Chat Fic, Homophobia, Mentions of abusive situations, Nonbinary Character, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Transphobia, Will add TW's by chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-04-19 18:09:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14242905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HailingTorrent/pseuds/HailingTorrent
Summary: Scales of Pink has added The Blues, Reading Rainbow, What Ale’s Ya and 11 others.Scales Of Pink: Sup everyone!The Blues: Delete me.Buff Pikachu: Same.The Police: Same (Also, the fuck is my name?)Frejord: IS MY NAME A FUCKIN’ LEAUGE OF LEGENDS REFERENCE???????????





	1. Don't Meme Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, everyone! I've been really meaning to try my hand at a chatfic, so I'm gonna have a go at this one. I already uploaded this before, but I kinda realized there were parts I wanted to edit and change. Hopefully everyone enjoys it!
> 
> Usernames:  
> Scales Of Pink: Natsu  
> Frejord: Gray  
> Edgehog: Rogue  
> The Police: Sting  
> Ash: Freed  
> Buff Pikachu: Laxus  
> Team Mom: Mirajane  
> Busy Studying The Blade: Erza  
> Reading Rainbow: Levy  
> The Blues: Gajeel  
> Keyblade Nerd: Lucy  
> You're Mom Let You Have Three Mohawks: Bickslow  
> Moon-Moon: Lisanna  
> The Fair Folk: Evergreen.  
> What Ale's Ya: Cana.  
> Lifts and Reps: Elfman

**_Scales of Pink_** has added **_The Blues, Reading Rainbow, What Ale’s Ya and 11 others._**

 **Scales Of Pink:** Sup everyone!

 **The Blues:** Delete me.

 **Buff Pikachu:** Same.

 **The Police:** Same (Also, the fuck is my name?)

 **Frejord:** IS MY NAME A FUCKIN’ LEAUGE OF LEGENDS REFERENCE???????????

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Would u lads all calm down. Caught me in da middle of somethin and yer blowin up my phone.

 **Edgehog:** Sting, I’m pretty sure you’re username is a references to the musician Sting.

 **Reading Rainbow:** Rogue, you used you’re wrong.

 **Edgehog:** *Your. Thank you, Levy.

 **Ash:** Natsu, may I ask what the purpose of this chat is?

 **Ash:** And may I also ask the meaning of my name?

 **The Fair Folk:** Look at Laxus’s name.

 **The Fair Folk:** Now look back to yours.

 **Ash:** Ah.

 **Buff Pikachu:** *Whispers* It’s because we’re    gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

 **Ash:** I got that.

 **Buff Pikachu:** Also, again. Delete me.

 **Scales of Pink:** No to all of that except Freed.

 **Scales of Pink:** We pretty much spend all our freakin time together in’ an out of school, so I thought it’d be cool to set up a group chat.

 **Buff Pikachu:** I see.

 **Buff Pikachu:** Delete me.

 **Keyblade Nerd:** Don’t be fuckin’ rude, Laxus. Same to the rest of you.

 **Keyblade Nerd:** If you really wanted to leave, you could just remove yourself.

 **Keyblade Nerd:** But you didn’t.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Lucy #TooSavageForFairyTailHigh.

 **Moon-Moon:** I can’t believe that Lucy just mcfuckin ended friend-drama.

 **Reading Rainbow:** I’m sorry, but who’s Moon-Moon?

 **Moon-Moon:** Oh, it’s Lisanna

 **Reading Rainbow:** Ah, OK!

 **Reading Rainbow:** Maybe we should do introductions.

 **Reading Rainbow:** This is Levy.

 **The Blues:** This is Gajeel, and the name Pink Panther choose for me is the only thing I don’t hate about this chat.

 **Reading Rainbow:** Even me?

 **The Blues:** One of two things I don’t hate.

 **Reading Rainbow:** Yayyyyyyyy.

 **Busy Studying The Blade:** Erza, and you all interrupted my sword practice. Why is my name that?

 **Frejord:** Give her a sec.

 **Busy Studying The Blade:** Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh.

 **Frejord:** There we go.

 **Frejord:** This is Gray, and I’m getting really sick of all these League of Legends jokes. I played it once.

 **Scales Of Pink:** And cosplayed Lux.

 **Frejord:** That was back when I thought I was a girl. Doesn’t count.

 **Reading Rainbow:** Relatable tho.

 **Reading Rainbow:** I once dressed as Phoenix Wright during my male days, and if anyone brings it up, you’ll get a DS to the face.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Dis is Cana. And am currently going thru Last of Us wile high for a dare. So dnt fuckin interrupt.

 **Moon-Moon:** A true legend.

 **The Police:** Rogue noticed this earlier, but I’m Sting. I also hate my name, cos I have a very pro-‘fuck the police’ rep, and I’d appreciate it if you cis-hets didn’t ruin it.

 **Edgehog:** You say cis-hets as if the majority of people in this chat aren’t queer.

 **Edgehog:** And this is Rogue.

 **Team Mom:** This is Mirajane, and I would like to make sure everyone did their homework.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Livin up to dat username I see.

 **Team Mom:** And you should be doing the English assignment we got from Wakaba.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Yer not my Mom.

 **Moon-Moon:** She is tho.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Shit yer right.

 **Lifts And Reps:** This is Elfman, and I love my username!

 **The Fair Folk:** Fuckin course you do. And Elfgreen.

 **Your Mom Let You Have Three Mohawks:** Bickslow, and while I can appreciate the name, it’s a bit long don’t you think?

 **The Fair Folk:** You have three fuckin’ mohawks. Nothing’s long enough to describe that.

 **The Police:** Rip.

 **Ash:** Freed, and I’m changing my name.

**_Ash_ ** _has changed their username to **Not Easy Being Green.**_

**Buff Pikachu:** Really?

 **Not Easy Being Green:** The Muppets are a classic, and only a pleb would think otherwise.

 **Buff Pikachu:** Laxus, and I’m oddly OK with my name.

 **The Blues:** It’s because yer a Pokemon fanboy.

 **Buff Pikachu:** And you’re not?

 **The Blues:** I don’t gotta answer that. You ain’t the police.

 **Keyblade Nerd:** Lucy, and ironically enough I’m watching the new KOH trailer.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Weeb.

 **Keyblade Nerd:** You’re a weeb.

 **What Ale’s Ya:** Shit yer right.

 **Scales of Pink:** And this is Natsu. Think that’s everyone.

 **The Blues:** Coolio.

**_The Blues_ ** _has left the chat._

**_Reading Rainbow_ ** _has added **The Blues** to the chat._

**The Blues:** Worth a shot.


	2. Roasting Bora

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bora's a Dick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, everyone :) Thanks for the positive feedback. I really appreciate it.
> 
> TW: This chapter contains transphobia. If this is a trigger for you, please put your comfort first.

**The Blues:** My suspension is bullshit and I would do it again.

**Moon-Moon:** Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? You got suspended????? For what?

**Your Mom Let You Have Three Mohawks** **:** Did you eat spare change on a dare again?

**The Blues:** No.

**The Blues:** And can’t a man eat some coins for a bet and not get a reputation?

**Frejord:** No. No you can’t.

**Frejord:** And I also think I know what happened.

**Frejord:** If I’m right, I am 100% behind Gajeel.

**Studied The Blade:** Oh, is this about Bora?

**The Blues:** Yuuuuuuuuuuuup.

**Busy Studying The Blade:** Oh yeah, then you were totally in the right.

**Busy Studying The Blade:** How’s Levy doing?

**Moon-Moon:**?? Bora? Levy?? Erza agreeing with Gajeel?? What is this madness??????

**Moon-Moon:** Have we memed ourselves into an alternate dimension????????

**Buff Pikachu:** Remember seeing that prick with a busted nose. Knew if it wasn’t me, probably you did it.

**Buff Pikachu:** Probably definitely deserved it.

**What Ale’s Ya:** Wat did the fucboi do now?????

**Team Mom:** Everyone, please give Gajeel some space. This could be stressful for him and Levy, and we shouldn’t keep pressuring him.

**Team Mom:** But I would also like to point out that I share Ecom with Bora and can make things _very_ difficult for him .

**KeyBlade Nerd:** She’s not just Team Mom, she’s also Fite-Mom!

**KeyBlade Nerd** BTW, Levy’s fine. I’m with her at Gajeel’s house. We’re playing Madden.

**Keyblade Nerd:** Well, me and Levy are playing. Gajeel’s losing :p

**Team Mom:** Oh, I’m glad

**What Ale’s Ya:** Didn’t we tel Steely-Dan to get sum beter fukin games

**The Blues:** Didn’t I tell you to pay me back for that Vodka I got you?

**What Ale’s Ya:** Shit yer right

**Lift And Reps:** Bora’s actions were completely unmanly!

**Fair Folk:** Well, that’s his two cents.

**Fair Folk:** Not that I don’t agree with him.

**Scales Of Pink:** Sorry, guys. I fell asleep as soon as I got home. Didn’t see the phone till now.

**Scales Of Pink:** Oh shit.

**Scales Of Pink:** I’m gonna kick Bora’s ass.

**The Blues:** Do you even know what he did?

**Scales Of Pink:** Nope.

**Buff Pikachu:** Seems fair.

**Ain’t Easy Being Green:** Would Levy be OK with you telling us what happened, Gajeel? We all completely understand if she isn’t.

**Ain’t Easy Being Green:** Send her my best wishes.

**Moon-Moon:** Oh totally. We don’t need to know.

**The Blues:** Nah, says she’s OK with it.

**The Blues:** Half the chat seems to know anyway, so why the fuck not.

**The Blues:** The last part was from me. We all know that curse words are a no-no for Levy.

**The Blues:** So, Me and Levy were walking to Science when Mr. Prick Magee decided to shout some very assholish stuff at us.

**The Blues:** I ain’t gonna repeat it, but you can take a guess.

**The Blues:** When I told him to shut his mouth, he fuckin misgendered Levy.

There were no messages for thirty seconds.

**Buff Pikachu:** He’s dead. I’m going to kill him.

**Ain’t Easy Being Green:** I got your flower, Laxus. Get him.

**Scales Of Time:** Oh, he’s so getting his ass kicked!

**Your Mom Lets You Have Three Mohawks:** What a grade-A asswipe.

**Moon-Moon:** Hope Bora likes dog-shit in his locker. Cos that’s what he’s gonna find for the rest of the year.

**Team Mom:** Gajeel, tell Levy if she needs anything I’m here.

**Team Mom:** And then tell her I am going to rain hot demonic heck on Bora.

**Frejord:** Team Mom don’t need cursing to be Fite Mom.

**Frejord:** Yeah, the piece of shit made some cracks when he saw my binder in the changing room. Shut right up when I made his eye black.

**Frejord:** Should’ve given him a lot more it seems.

**Fair Folk:** From what I saw of him, his nose is going to be pointing westward for the foreseeable future.

**Fair Folk:** Some of your finest work, Gajeel.

**What Ale’s Ya:** Dat little bich. He’s so gettin stabbed.

**Keyblade Fed-Ex Girl:** Don’t stab, Cana. Your knife’s too good for his blood.

**What Ale’s Ya:** Shit yer right.

**What Ale’s Ya:** Wel, a kick to the bals is on its way.

**The Blues:** He’s gonna have my fucking fist imprinted on his nose for the next month.

**The Blues:** Make him think twice before trying that shit again.

**The Blues:** Got slapped with a two week suspension from the school.

**Reading Rainbow:** I really wish you hadn’t gotten yourself in trouble for me.

**Reading Rainbow:** But I prefer to think of it as a two week gift for being the best boyfriend.

**What Ale’s Ya:** LEVY!

**Busy Studying The Blades:** LEVY!

**Lifts And Reps:** LEVY!

**Moon-Moon:** How are you doing, Gurl?

**Moon-Moon:** I have the dogshit at the ready!

**Reading Rainbow:** I’m fine, Lisanna.

**Reading Rainbow:** But I may take you up on that offer.

**Reading Rainbow:** Honestly, it was pretty rough. Used to just hearing that kind of stuff said behind my back or when I’m out on the town. Shook me up to hear someone so open about it.

**Reading Rainbow:** But when I have such awesome friends like you guys, it’s nothing!

**Ain’t Easy Being Green:** Levy, you are an amazing girl and deserve the world.

**Key-Blade Nerd:** Levy #ConfirmedBestGirl.

**Frejord:** I’ll drink to that.

**Frejord:** Also, I could get Rogue and we could have one of our ‘Fuck Gender Nights’ again.

**Buff Pikachu:** You’re a hundred times more badass than that coward.

**Reading Rainbow:** You guys! I’m crying.

**Key-Blade Nerd:** She’s not lying. Tears all over Gajeel’s jacket.

**Reading Rainbow:** And I’d love that, Grey 

**Scales Of Pink:** Now that ya mention it, where is Rogue?

**Busy Studying The Blade:** And Sting?

**Moon-Moon:** _The Truth is out there._

**Moon-Moon:** _*X-Files theme starts playing*_

* * *

 

**_Shadow-Bae To Light-Bae:_ **

**Light Bae:** Got the spray paint?

**Shadow Bae:** Indeed. You have his address?

**Light Bae:** Uh-huh.

**Light Bae:** How’s Levy doing?

**Shadow Bae:** Better. Everyone in the chat is being great.

**Shadow Bae:** They were actually asking about us.

**Light Bae:** Well, they’ll find out tomorrow.

**Shadow Bae:** Indeed.

**Shadow Bae:** So, what do you wish to write on Bora’s house?

**Light Bae:** Something smart, yknow. Something that’ll really hit the core of why he’s such a horrible person.

**Light Bae:** Deep and scathing.

**Shadow Bae:** You’re going to write ‘Prick’ in block capitals, aren’t you?

**Light Bae:** Oh Defo.

**Shadow Bae:** I love you so much.


	3. The One With The Deep Meanigful Chats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Real Steel: Oh
> 
> Real Steel: Well, I kinda feel like an asshole now.
> 
> Detective Pikachu: You should.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Howdy, everyone! I'm sorry for the late update. I originally had a different chapter 3 pre written, but lost it due to compute issues. I ended up writing a completely new chapter, which I hope everyone enjoys!
> 
> I am having a lot of fun writing this story. I am so so grateful for all the awesome feedback I'm getting. You are guys are amazeballs!
> 
> This chapter is a bit more emotional and angsty than the previous more comedic chapters.
> 
> TW: This chapter contains referenced transphobia, internalized transphobia and internalized homophobia, relationship angst and past toxic behaviour. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first. If I have missed any TWs, please tell me so I may add them in.
> 
> Usernames; 
> 
> Books Are Trans Girl Culture: Levy  
> Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE: Gray  
> Gender Is A Fuck: Rogue  
> Mercy Main BTW: Yukino  
> Detective Pikachu: Laxus.  
> Real Steel: Gajeel.

**_THOSE TRANSGENDERS COMMUNISTS:_ **

**Books Are Trans-Girl Culture:** Whaddup, my dudes, duddetees and dudenbies?

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Not much. Just schooling, pre-schooling and college educationing Natsu in Mario Kart.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Ah, I’m just doing some fanart for a commission I got. Hopefully I’ll be able to save up for that PWG show coming up.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** I am currently re-reading the Magnus Chase book series.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** It is a thrilling read.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** That’s great, Rogue.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** But are you sure you don’t have anything else to say?

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Nothing comes to mind, no.

**Book Are Trans Girl Culture:** Really?

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Are you sure you couldn’t……….

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** PAINT me a picture?

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture: Late Night At Bora’s.JPG**

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Oh.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** That.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** O-K-A-Y

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** First

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE: Why didn’t you invite me?**

**Ice Ice Testosterone: And second**

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE: YOU MUST BUMP THIS**

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE: Fist Bump.JPG**

**Mercy Main BTW:** While I cannot approve of you using an environment unhealthy spray, it is far far far beaten by my apporal of the act itself.

**Mercy Main BTW:** So, as my dear brother in arms just said:

**Mercy Main BTW:** YOU MUST BUMP THIS

**Mercy Main BTW: Fist Bump.JPG**

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** I would like to thank you for defending my honor to that stinky bigot.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** But I would also like to point out that, if you were planning to keep this secret. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea for Sting to post this on his Twitter with the following hashtags:

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Oh my God, there’s hashtags!

**Mercy Main BTW:** Levy, you do realize you now have a solemn duty to read those hashtags out now.

**Mercy Main BTW:** It’s, like, in the Bible.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** #RoastingTransphobes

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** #LateNightHijinks.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** #DateNightWithNightBae

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** #Savage.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Rogue, your boyfriend is the sweetest dork in the world.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Oh, I am very aware of that.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** It’s half of why I love him so much.

**Mercy Main BTW:** What’s the other half?

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** His sick hashtag game, obvs.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Can confirm. Is fact.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** I love all you gender-rebel dorks!

**Mercy Main BTW:** And we love you!

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** And no one loves Bora.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** HARSH

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** But true.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** While were on the subject of that Horse’s Arse.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** How is Gajeel handling the suspension?

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** If I’m being honest, I don’t know.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Whenever I try to talk to him about it, he just says stuff like “Asshole had it coming” or “No-one ever does that to you”.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Bora deserved what happened to him, but Gajeel didn’t deserve to get punished.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** He’s been really trying in his musical arts class, and I’m just worried I messed up his progress by getting him suspended.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Levy, I love you

**Mercy Main BTW:** But you need to shut up saying things like that.

**Mercy Main BTW:** This was Gajeel’s decision. It was a badass and awesome decision, but it was his.

**Mercy Main BTW:** The fact that Gran Dorma is acting like a Grand Shit about it isn’t your fault.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Bet it’s been killing you trying to find a way to use that ‘grand shit’ line.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Literally dying.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Thanks, Yukino.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** You are a true MVTG (Most Valued Trans Gal)

**Mercy Main BTW:** Awh, it’s easy when you learn from the best.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Well, I wouldn’t call myself the best.

**Mercy Main BTW:** My big sis Angel!

**Mercy Main BTW:** Oooooooh, you thought I meant you.

**Mercy Main BTW:** A-kward.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** You’re fucking with her, aren’t you?

**Mercy Main BTW:** Of course I am. Levy is, and always will be, Best Girl.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Just as you are Best Enby.

**Mercy Main BTW:** And Gray is like, fourth Best Guy.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** HAR-HAR-HAR-HAR-HAR-HAR-HAR-HAR

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** YOU’RE FUNNY. YOU SHOULD BE A COMEDIAN.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Catch my Netflix special.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** “He said, sarcastically, in a sarcastic tone, with a sarcastic look on his face, in a room drenched with sarcasm.”

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Guys, could I inject some realness into the chat.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Shoot Straight, Levy.

**Ice Ice Testosterone:** Something on your mind?

**Gender Is A Fuck:** We’re here to listen.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Okay.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** I love Gajeel. And I know he loves me.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** But I can’t help but feel he might be better off if he was

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Not dating me.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** He wouldn’t have to deal with jerks in the hallway saying really horrible jerkish stuff at him all the time. He wouldn’t have to deal with everyone laughing at him when he calls me his girlfriend.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Maybe it’d be better if he just dated a cis girl.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Not to hijack, but I feel you so much.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** I feel like Sting is busy trying to fight everyone who says Enby-phobic stuff towards me all the time.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** And while I love him for it, I can’t help but feel like I’m dragging him into my problems.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Don’t get me wrong. I’m proud as all heavens to be my Agender self.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** But that doesn’t mean it’s not hard.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Guys, we love you (Gonna Steal Yukino’s line from earlier here)

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** But you two really gotta stop thinking that people being assholes is your fault.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Sting and Gajeel both chose to be with you two.

**Ice Ice Testosterone:** And why the hell wouldn’t they? You are two of the coolest and most kind people in the world!

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Look I’ve never dated so maybe I’m outta line.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Hell maybe the reason I haven’t is cos I’m afraid I’ll feel how you guys do now.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** But your boyfriends are glad to be with you. Hell, they’re grateful!

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Again, why wouldn’t they be? Pair of top tier badass and quality partners you are.

**Mercy Main BTW:** Gray

**Mercy Main BTW:** You have just advanced to Second Best Guy.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** Second?

**Mercy Main BTW:** Well, Bickslow is my Aro-Ace bro. He has that spot reserved.

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Gray, that was wonderful.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Once again, I am crying tears of joy.

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Which is partly your words. Partly cos my estrogen dosage got upped.

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** All in a days work as Best Guy

**Mercy Main BTW:** BEST SQUAD REPRESENT!

**Books Are Trans Girl Culture:** Oh Worm?

**Ice Ice TESTOSTERONE:** *Astral projects to Best Squad*

**Gender Is A Fuck:** Oh shit waddup?

**Mercy Main BTW:** ROGUE NO

* * *

 

**_Detective Pikachu_ ** _to **Real Steel.**_

**Detective Pikachu:** Yo, you up?

**Real Steel:** It’s 9:30.

**Detective Pikachu:** I go to bed at 10.

**Real Steel:** Wow, I thought Makarov was the fuckin senior citizen.

**Detective Pikachu:** Well, that uncalled for dig is a good Segway for what I wanted to talk about.

**Detective Pikachu:** I was talking to my gramps about the shit with the suspension.

**Detective Pikachu:** It might take some rubbing elbows and ass kissing, but he’s positive he can get you back in school by Tuesday.

**Real Steel:** Oh

**Real Steel:** Well, I kinda feel like an asshole now.

**Detective Pikachu:** You should.

**Real Steel:** Look, I don’t wanna sound ungrateful or any bullshit like that

**Real Steel:** But why are ya’ helping me? Never really thought of us as close buds or that sort of shit.

**Detective Pikachu:** Right

**Detective Pikachu:** Do you want the short answer that’s a lie and will get us out of having an awkward conversation

**Detective Pikachu:** Or do you want the long one that’s the truth, but will probably lead to us talking about some real shit?

**Real Steel:** I wanna choose the lie. But Imma go against my better judgement and choose the truth.

**Detective Pikachu:** Afraid of that.

**Detective Pikachu:** You know how we used to be right bullying pricks?

**Real Steel:** Bit fucking blunt

**Real Steel:** But yeah. I do.

**Real Steel:** Try fucking not to tho.

**Detective Pikachu:** Well, somehow, us two arseholes managed to actually become better people.

**Detective Pikachu:** I don’t still bully kids cos of my internalized homophobia.

**Detective Pikachu:** And you don’t go around picking fights with anyone near you cos of your own shit.

**Real Steel:** This leadin somewhere?

**Detective Pikachu:** Look, I can’t justify the shitty things I’ve done in the past. You can’t either. We can just try to move forward and try to be halfway decent people.

**Detective Pikachu:** And we’ve done good on that. I’m dating the smartest and coolest boyfriend in the world, who ain’t afraid to call me out on my bullshit.

**Detective Pikachu:** And you’re with quite possibly the kindest girl in the whole universe. And who I have a feeling ain’t afraid to call you out on your bullshit.

**Detective Pikachu:** We’ve also managed to surround ourselves with pretty good people.

**Real Steel:** That’s all true.

**Real Steel:** But again

**Real Steel:** Is this fucking leadin somewhere?

**Detective Pikachu:** What I’m saying is that me and you have something in common. Something we don’t with the rest of the guys.

**Detective Pikachu:** So, I dunno.

**Detective Pikachu:** Guess I feel like we should try to look out for the other.

**Detective Pikachu:** Keep both of us on the straight and narrow.

**Real Steel:** I get that.

**Real Steel:** And you were right.

**Real Steel:** That was awkward as all hell.

**Detective Pikachu:** Fucking tell me about it.

**Real Steel:** And thanks. You didn’t have to get your gramps to stick his neck out as the vice princ, but I appreciate it.

**Detective Pikachu:** Anytime, Asshole.

**Real Steel:** Right back at ya, Senior Citizen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

****


	7. It's Gonna Get Real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poke-Bro: You've been typing for five minutes, so I'm assuming you're about to drop some gigantic-ass bombshell on me.
> 
> Poke-Bro: Soooooooooooooooooooooo
> 
> Poke-Bro: *Gets in bombshelter.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Howdy! This chapter just feature Gajeel and Laxus.
> 
> TWs for Referenced Transphobia and Homophobia, Dysphoria, Abusive Parents and Internalized Transphobia. Please put your comfort first before reading.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

**_Real Steel to Poke-Bro_ **

 

**Real Steel:** New name I see.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Same name I see.

 

**Real Steel:** Still annoying as fuck I see.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Till I'm dead and cold, my friend.

 

**Real Steel:** Shit

 

**Real Steel:** We friends now?

 

**Poke-Bro:** Oh GOd.

 

**Poke-Bro:** I think we are.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Gajeel, I swear I never meant for this to happen.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Please, we can go back to hating each other. Anything is a better than the insufferable pain of being FRIENDS! OH THE INDIGNITY!

 

**Real Steel:** Ya don bein an ass?

 

**Poke-Bro:** Depends.

 

**Poke-Bro:** You gonna tell me why you messaged?

 

**Real Steel:** What someone cant jus mesage a friend?

 

**Poke-Bro:** Well

 

**Poke-Bro:** Considering we haven't ever messaged each other more than once this year

 

**Poke-Bro:** I'm gonna take a stretch and say noooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

 

**Real Steel:** I miss back when you were an asshole.

 

**Poke-Bro:** No ya don't.

 

**Real Steel:** True.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Look, I know I was acting a bit of a dick. But you don't gotta tell me if you don't want to.

 

**Real Steel:** Nah nah

 

**Real Steel:** Just

 

**Real Steel:** giv me a sec

 

**Poke-Bro:** Take your time, man.

 

**Real Steel:** Jesus, you had to say that, didn't ya

 

**Poke-Bro:** What?

 

**Poke-Bro:** Did I say something wrong?

 

**Poke-Bro:** You've been typing for five minutes, so I'm assuming you're about to drop some gigantic-ass bombshell on me.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Soooooooooooooooooooooo

 

**Poke-Bro:** *Gets in bombshelter.*

 

**Real Steel:** Shit, I don't even now if I'm feelin this, or if I'm jus goin crazy. It's like my fuckin head is about to break open. Got tons of crap swirling in this shit-machine of a brain. Can't stand it. It's been like this for months. I've been getting thoughts in my head. Thoughts that are like the stuff that we talk about in the group shit alot. I don't know what to make of em. 

 

**Real Steel:** Fuck pikachu.

 

**Real Steel:** Think I'm a girl.

 

**Poke-Bro:** First

 

**Poke-Bro:** I'm so sorry for calling you a man earlier. That was a dick move of me.

 

**Real-Steel:** You didn't even fucking know, Pikachu.

 

**Real Steel:** Fuck what am I doing

 

**Real Steel:** How can I be a girl. Im some ugly mug. Im a goddamn giant. Aint no one ever gonna think I'm one

 

**Real Steel:** Should just stop thinking this shit.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Ok first

 

**Poke-Bro:** These feelings are completely normal.

 

**Poke-Bro:** But also

 

**Poke-Bro:** If you heard Levy saying this stuff to her, what would you tell her?

 

**Real Steel:** That she was fuckin gorgeous and anyone who don't know it needs to get their fuckin head caved in.

 

**Real Steel:** Oh I see what you did there.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Freed has taught me well.

 

**Poke-Bro:** And Levy might have something to teach you.

 

**Real Steel:** No

 

**Real Steel:** I'm not putting this on her.

 

**Real Steel:** The munchkin has way too much shit to deal with

 

**Real Steel:** She doesn't need mine.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Gajeel, she knows what you're going through. She would want to help.

 

**Real Steel:** Laxus

 

**Real Steel:** Drop it.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Oh firstname

 

**Poke-Bro:** Power move

 

**Poke-Bro:** Alright, I won't push. Lord knows I'm not the kinda guy to force someone out of the closet.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Ol' Dad doing that to me kinda put me off it.

 

**Real Steel:** Fuck, Metallica

 

**Real Steel:** The hell he's gonna think.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Well, he's pretty chill with you dating Levy

 

**Poke-Bro:** So he'd probably be G with you.

 

**Real Steel:** Metallica's just the tip of the fuckin iceberg

 

**Real Steel:** I’m the school’s resident shithead. Think any of em will believe I’m a girl

 

**Real Steel:** Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

 

**Poke-Bro:** Gajeel (Don’t know if you’re down with that name, but it’s all I got)

 

**Poke-Bro:** Breathe

 

**Real-Steel:** I don’t breathe

 

**Real Steel:** I angery

 

**Real Steel:** It’s all I fuckin do

 

**Real Steel:** It’s all people think of me

 

**Real Steel:** Too angry to be a good student

 

**Real Steel:** Too angry to be a girl

 

**Poke-Bro:** Gajeel, you’re a girl. If you say it, you are one. Ain’t nothin more to it.

 

**Poke-Bro:** Now, I ain’t gonna force you out of the closet. But, I’ll be there when you do.

 

**Poke-Bro:** If you do

 

**Poke-Bro:** And we will all accept you

 

**Real Steel:** Jesus

 

**Real Steel:** This has gotten mushy

 

**Real Steel:** I miss when we hated each other

 

**Poke-Bro:** No ya don’t

 

**Real Steel:** True

 

**Real Steel:** So 

 

**Real Steel:** What now?

 

**Poke-Bro:** Well, it’s 8:30

 

**Poke-Bro:** Which means it’s……………….

 

**Poke-Bro:** TIME TO VAPE

 

**Real Steel:** OK, I still think I hate you

 

**Real Steel:** But in a fun way

 

**Poke Bro:** The best way.

 


End file.
